What's your best drunk skier wreck story?
Not exactly a "wreck" story, but funny nonetheless. Early on in my college/patrolling career I worked a local ski area near school. We picked up a mess of a teenager, stumbling drunk. We'll call her "Susie Jones", and "Bill" the hill lead phoned her mother.
Hello, Mrs Jones?
Yes, this is Mrs Jones.
This is Bill calling from the ski patrol, we have your daughter here in the patrol room, and unfortunate she's inebriated. You will need to pick her up.
I'm sorry, you must have the wrong Susie Jones, my Susie doesn't drink.
Ok ma'am, is Susie wearing blue jeans and a green parka?
That sounds like my Susie, but my Susie doesn't drink.
Ok, she's got ping gloves and a pink hat?
Again, that sounds like Susie but my Susie doesn't drink.
Mrs Jones, Can you at least drop by and confirm we've got the wrong Susie Jones?
Do you really think that's necessary, again, my Susie doesn't drink.
Ok Mrs Jones, when Susie doesn't arrive home on the bus, you'll find her in protective custody at the county jail. You are aware the police are obligated to alert social services?
[insert a couple of curse words] fine, I'm on my way.
